by Joe Saunders
Clark Dawes (“Costa Rica Report,” p. 7) is a journalist and the only Minutiæ staff member currently in prison.
Tam Parsons (“Sports Round Up,” p. 12) is a writer, actor, dancer, singer, guitarist, painter, sculptor, photographer, film critic, standup comedian, chef, teacher, D.J., magician, prancer, and maritime lawyer living in Los Angeles. This is her first time covering sports for Minutiæ.
Andrew Witty (“The Rap Game Today,” p. 15) is an aspiring writer from Brooklyn and the C.F.O. of GlaxoSmithKline, a massive multinational pharmaceutical company. Check out his Kickstarter for bringing Lovaza to schools in Detroit in an old cherry red Ford pickup.
Nicholas Knocker (“Dance Like Your Wife Depends On It,” p. 19) is the pseudonym of a very famous writer who did not want to use his real name because he is embarrassed by how badly his piece turned out. Let’s just say he likes playing games about thrones…
Ronaldo Cantone (“Hover Craft, Hover Never,” p. 20) is an award-winning busboy at a local diner.
Karen Lisa (“Watch Your Baby,” p. 21) was born in Chicago, grew up in Denver, briefly lived in Tucson, then moved back in Denver, then spent six months in Toronto, four in Charleston, one in Atlanta, then went to Houston, back again to Denver, had a three day stopover in St. Louis, spent some crazy years in Little Rock and Portland, and now she calls Miami home. But really, after all that, is any place really home, Karen?
Raquel O’Brien (“Black Van,” p. 23) is 91 years old and has written a piece for every issue of Minutiæ since 1960. For many years, however, she was credited as “Robert O’Brien” — but then one day, Robert walked into the office and said we should call him “Raquel” from now on. And that was that.
Mr. Cooper (“Smokin’ In The Boys Room,” p. 25) is the school security guard and says you can’t park in this lot unless you’re a student. He doesn’t care if you’re dating a student. The lot is for students only.
Dr. Frosty (“Movie Reviews: Ted & Total Recall,” p. 27) is a supervillain who has the power to slowly lower the temperature of a room several degrees over the course of an hour and also to always know exactly what time it is.
Jean Paul Gotye (“Somebody That I Used to Whoa,” p. 29) is a musician, a fashion designer, and a combination musician/fashion designer.
Dan Davis (“This Month’s Contributors,” p. 2) is the editorial intern for Minutiæ responsible for assembling the bios for this month’s contributors. Since he’s known for his office hijinks, his supervisor Mr. Molina warned him not to do anything funny with this month’s list, like put himself in. Well, guess what, Mr. Molina? He did.